You’re Nuts: What trinket should Ohio State women’s basketball team get for beating Michigan?

Everybody knows that one of the best parts of being a sports fan is debating and dissecting the most (and least) important questions in the sporting world with your friends. So, we’re bringing that to the pages of LGHL with our favorite head-to-head column: You’re Nuts.

In You’re Nuts, two LGHL staff members will take differing sides of one question and argue their opinions passionately. Then, in the end, it’s up to you to determine who’s right and who’s nuts.

Today’s Question: What trinket should Ohio State women’s basketball team get for beating Michigan?

Context: Earlier this week, the Ohio State women beat their rival Michigan Wolverines in a battle of top-16 squads. In doing so, the Buckeyes secured a top-four seeding and boule-bye in the upcoming Big Ten Tournament.

Thomas’ Take: A Gold Ring

Following Monday’s win in Ann Arbor, Michigan for the Ohio State women’s basketball team, head coach Kevin McGuff was prompted about what Buckeyes players get for beating their bitter rivals, the Michigan Wolverines.

“There isn’t,” said McGuff. “There probably should be but we do not have the gold pants or so forth, but I’m sure by the end of the night that my players will ask me that.”

There’s a strong rivalry building between the two sides, and there most definitely should be something to award the players, but what?

My first thought was a dub chain for everyone, but that has obvious issues of cost and storage. I mean, they play each other twice a year, and possibly three times with the Big Ten Tournament. The cost would skyrocket and where is a player like forward Cotie McMahon going to put potentially 5-10 big dub chains?

Instead, I landed on rings. Not a diamond-encrusted championship ring but not one that’ll turn the player’s fingers green. Something in the middle of the road, engraved with the score and date on the outside of it.

It works on multiple levels. Great for photo ops at the end of a player’s career and can easily be put in a display case.

Imagine the NIL opportunities where the players can be paid to rub it in the face of their “neighbors” to the north. Local businesses would love to highlight it and anytime the women’s basketball players get paid for their craft is a win.

Plus, the Ohio State women’s basketball team managers already know how to smelt.

Matt’s Take: A Waterford Crystal Key

In 1835-36, the state of Ohio and the neighboring territory of Michigan engaged in a war that would go down in the history books. No, not like the 10-Year War between Woody and his IRL BFF Bo. Nor the current, relatively one-sided war between Jim Harbaugh and Ryan Day, but an actual, guns and killing people war.

The reason for the military skirmish? You guessed it, who owned Toledo. Since you likely know that the great city of Toledo is part of the great state of Ohio, you can imagine how that war ended.

So, in honor of that great victory, I believe that when the women’s basketball team beats the dastardly Michigan Wolverines, they should be rewarded with something symbolizing the source of this bitter rivalry that has been festering for nearly two centuries.

As you might know, Toledo is known as the Glass City; the Toledo Rockets football team plays in the Glass Bowl. So, as the rightful owners of Toledo, when the OSU women’s basketball team beats TTUN, I believe that they should get a glass key to the city.

Now, not just any old glass key, but a fancy — and not inexpensive — Waterford Crystal glass key; like the one below, but blinged up a bit. Can you imagine a Block O for the bow and maybe the score of the game as the bit (can you tell I just Googled “Parts of a Key diagram)?

I think that would be an appropriate honor for defending the state of Ohio from the violent marauders from Michigan. It might not be as wearable as gold pants or a gold ring, but it has legitimate meaning behind it, and those Waterford Crystal things aren’t cheap, so they will assuredly appreciate in value over the years.